A friend of mine, Ms. Cuba, is a teacher of storytelling and drama. She moves children into unfolding a fable, creating their own and understanding them. Ms. Cuba, like everyone asks me about her future. My answer used to be "it is based on your decisions."
A few years ago I focused on a quote from Kundalini yoga teacher, Yogi Bhajan, where he said our life is a journey; we are living it, creating it every moment. So, why are we always wondering where we are going when we are unfolding our journey at every turn?
Last year a chiropractor introduced me to his term for people's journey, for their quest for their future-"story." At first I was taken aback, put it in my pocket, and forgot about it. What is someone's story? The more Walter and I spoke, the more I became entranced by his concept of someone's story. To him, these twists and turns we take are part of our story. When we fall, when we get a scrape and get confused which way to go, it is all part of our story. We are all Snow White lost in the forest, finding friends in unusual places and pursuing a dream.
I have always been fascinated with people's "stories"-where they've been, what they have seen, things they've done. My in-laws backpacked through India and Iran. My mother had an arranged marriage. My husband's co-worker would steal neighbor's farm animals to play with (with her mother constantly having to return the chickens, goats and dogs to her neighbors). All of these actions and moments peaked my interest leading me to think each time "Do people know this about you? People should know this!" Still in these moments, I never connected their experiences to the story of their lives. They were still interesting moments. People were fascinating. I felt that everyone should be sharing more about themselves.
If anyone asked me a year ago what I thought about my life, I would have said boring! Maybe not to you, but to me. While I was always creating and moving, it was hum drum. Same old. The most interesting parts of me were about my three major experiences early in life. One - I was in a bank robbery when I was around two years old in Manhattan, my mother telling me to be quiet so we didn't get shot. Two-I was in a coma due to an inner ear infection (around the same age) and came out of it when a family friend and babysitter sat with me praying all night. Three-I shook the hand of a former pope-Pope John Paul II when I was a little child.
Sure, I had other interesting moments in my life, but these three things, two of which I could not remember, were the highlights of who I was. These were my stories I could fascinate people with.
Walter changed my thinking. What if our lives, our journey that we are on each day, was our story? Whole and complete. Not just a moment in time. Not the funny story of a water balloon exploding or meeting someone famous. Not just the time we went sky diving or ran a 5k. What if the accumulation of our lives was our story? What would that mean?
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| Photography by Poras Chaudhary |
Our future is not yet written. Isn't that an old adage? And yet we seek our future, the end to our book. If the book is written, then the last phrase would be "The End." Do we really want "The End" just yet. Or could we possibly still fill a few more pages, adding to our story, who we are. We are all unique individuals creating our story every day. That is our immortality. Who we are, right there in the pages of our lives. We create, we share, we co-create. People we know are characters in our story influencing who we are and how we grow.
In The Muppet Movie, we are left at the finale without a typical ending. I personally love that little ribbon tied at the end of every film. Give me the obvious. Instead, the muppets tell Lou Lord they came to Hollywood to be "rich and famous." Mr. Lord tells his secretary to "prepare the standard rich and famous contract for Kermit and company." The muppets move onto the sound stage where in the making of their film, accidentally tear it apart.
What happened? They were given the contract. They tried to make a movie. Did they get kicked out? The film ends with the muppets watching their film. No one else attends. No red carpet. We know they become famous because they had a television show I watched as a child and subsequent films. However, in the moment of our lives where we are challenged, we can't see our own successes, of where our disasters may take us. We also don't see how we influence other people.
As a writer, I am known for tossing much of my work into the electronic recycle bin of my computer. My husband told me when he worked at a distribution center for artists in Toronto, the artists would call to ask for their earlier works to be destroyed. "I don't want anyone to see the crap I made when I was younger," they would say as their skills grew. My husband would reply "Don't you want people to see how you grew as an artist? Don't you think it would make budding artists realize that everyone started somewhere?" But his replies fell on deaf ears like it did with me as I deleted my files and emptied my recycle bin.
How often do we see artists, cooks, scientists influenced by another's creation. French filmmaker, Michel Gondry's Bachelorette cycling a story like in The Muppet Movie. Kushari, an Egyptian dish of lentils with rice and elbow noodles with its Italian and Asian influence. Thai Yoga drawing in energy points and body movement from India and Tibet.
What if we kept the good, the bad, the rough starts and the undiscovered masterpieces of our decisions? Would that show everyone how life has its bumps, nudges and hills, but as a person we forge ahead?
Kermit sings "life's like a movie, write your own ending." Today, I start to think of my life as whole. I am writing my journey every day. Each piece. Each word. Each thought. Each action. Part of the story of me.
